What Fresh Hell is this? {WIW: a bald spot}


Is it just me or do you go through life thinking you look one way, then see a picture that tells the opposite story?  It happens, right?  I take selfies all the time, and think, I look pretty good for a 35 year old mother of two who isn't wearing make up and can't remember the last time she washed her hair.  It may sound vain, but I have days like that.  Where I surprise myself at how well I pull off "looking good".  My Instagram friends help too, with their encouragement.  So imagine my surprise as I was going through pictures from Caitlin's six birthday a few weeks ago, and found that I am going bald.

Let me repeat that, I, Megan, aged 35, with gray roots that put the Golden Girls to shame, with enough baggage under her eyes to travel all of Europe, with menopause knocking at the door, now has to deal with this:


Look, I'll be honest.  I can deal with a lot of this aging bullshit.  I was told at age 28 that my 'eggs' were old and that was why I was having a hard time conceiving.  Last year I was told that I was perhaps peri-menopausal, and given a pamphlet.  I even had a mammogram last year.  I've had grey hair since I was 16, only now it's progressively taking over as my natural color.  The crows feet, the laugh lines, the pooch of a belly/muffin top that will not go away with the hardest of Jillian workouts.  I agreed to all of that.  Most of that I can deal with.  I can hide it even.

You can't hide bald people.

I am just vain enough to have a meltdown about this.  I was devastated when I went through my camera roll. You would think it would have been the quality of all the photos the Hubbs took that day, but no.  Bald spot trumps blurry photos.  Always.

This has been my biggest fear for awhile.  My hair has been falling out like crazy for the better part of two years.  This whole time I've been thinking it's from my crown, or possibly underneath by my neck.  A few weeks ago I pulled a rat out of the drain.  Ok, it was a ball of hair, but it seriously could have passed for a hamster, or been given to locks of love.  I'm not even joking.  I was going to post a picture of it, but it was too gross.  All that lost hair has finally caught up with me... Right here on top of my head, for all the world to see.  Awesome.  Getting old ain't for sissies.  I can't even believe it since I got carded for beer last month!

So now what?  It's not like I can really cover this up?  I mean there is that hair powder spray in that infomercial for bald guys.  There is Rogaine.  Or as Colleen suggested, shave my head...  I'm on a mission to cover this shit up, with hats, paint, hair extensions what have you.  And before you say, just part your hair the other way, it doesn't.  I have a cow lick that makes parting my hair any other way impossible.

Until then, I thank God, I can crop my selfies like boss.