My husband really wants to take me out for Valentine's Day.
This may sound normal to you, but in this house, we rarely do Valentine's Day. Sure we do little things, like he will bring me flowers, look the other way when I charge a mani pedi on or around the fourteenth, and I may or may not cook dinner. Like a real one using pots and pans and ingredients that have to be chopped. But anything that needs a reservation or shaved legs is usually out of the question.
Isn't it romantic?
With Valentine's steadily approaching I suggested we go to this fancy chain restaurant because we got a gift card there for Christmas. Look, I am in no way above letting my man treat me with a gift card. Because money we save there means money I can spend on books or fifteen dollar salads at Whole Foods (which are a very real thing). But when he called they said they were booked. Booked? I didn't even know they took reservations, because WE NEVER GO ANYWHERE THAT WOULD NECESSITATE A RESERVATION. And I'm not complaining, it's just a fact. We go to places like Red Robin so no one notices that our kids are bat shit crazy.
The Hubbs was bummed, he called around to a few other restaurants and they too were booked, because I guess Valentine's Day is a thing... Who knew? So I suggested the Ultimate Valentine's Day;
Let's take the kids to my moms. Force them to spend the night. Then we can get take out or cook and then spend the entire night watching movies or stupid YouTube videos, or binge watch a show, in our bed... Then we can sleep in the next day and watch TV in bed or whatever... And we can be in our bed, alone. Just the two of us, in our bed watching movies that say the eff word. A lot.
Because if I'm totally honest, that's what I really want.
It's been years since it was just me and The Hubbs. We used to do those things. Wake up on a Sunday morning and stay in bed for most of the day. Watching dumb movie after dumb movie, and Lawd have mercy if Beerfest and Super Troopers was on. We'd eat food in bed and go to Starbucks and Taco Bell in our pajamas and ignore the laundry or the fact that the next day was Monday. There were no other mouths to feed or bodies to make/force to take a bath. It was just us, being lazy and enjoying every damn minute of it.
Isn't it romantic?
We found a restaurant. They had a reservation at seven. Which is fine since I have to work Valentine's Day anyway. We will get dressed up and ship the kids to my moms. We will enjoy ourselves and eat food we don't have to cook, on dishes we don't have to clean, and then we will come home, and most likely our kids will still be awake waiting for us. And it will be just as good as any Valentine's Day we've ever had.
But before you all get so wrapped up in what a romantic couple we are let me share this story...
The Hubbs and I both had to work last Saturday, but he had to be at his job hours before I had to be at mine. I heard him get up. Which is usually fine... Except he, well, what is it about men and the first thing they do immediately after waking is shit? I mean what is that? Anyway, here is our conversation:
Hubbs gets back into bed.
Good morning (whisper)
snuggling and cuddling happen
Are you up?
Stop. Shitting. With. The. Door. Open.
Bed starts shaking because the Hubbs is laughing
You heard that?
Yeah. I heard that.