I made it. Friday has a little over an hour left, but I really felt the pull to put my fingers on the keyboard tonight. It's been eight days since my last post, which to me seems like years as I type. I'd like to say that it's because I've been so busy, or because I've been working so much. The truth is, I just haven't been inspired to sit down and write in this space. I take pen to paper often, but the idea of sitting at the desk to type out thoughts makes me shifty. I'm still working on the final "Summer Cliche" post. I think you'll really like the last one. I've also been working on some of my fiction that I keep starting but never really finishing. And of course there is motherhood. I'm always working on motherhood, I'm always inspired by her, and lately I've been spending a lot of time there. In motherhood. Volunteering, being a taxi service, making dinners, reading books. All of the things that inspire words, but keep me from feeling like I can sit here for any length of time. So for now, I'm going to leave you with five things. Five things that were fresh in my mind and brought me here tonight.
I'm sick. Sore throat, cough, irritable, exhausted. I hate being sick, and I'm the worst patient. The entire house is annoyed with me. Still, the girls were kind and let me nap after pick up yesterday. I think the fudgscicles had something to do with that. The Hubbs brought me ice water at three this morning when I was coughing and crying because I felt like I was swallowing knives. I found some delicious cane sugar sweetened Popsicles at Whole Foods, since I can't eat normal ones like everyone else. I feel better today than yesterday, so I'm hoping tomorrow is better still. Being sick is stupid.
I looked up a few nights ago and saw this girl jamming while doing her homework. I promise you guys, we have been limiting screen time for these kids, but they slip under our radar. I wasn't mad though. Music is a huge part of my life, and it's becoming a big part of hers. We don't like the same tunes, but I will allow her to be inspired by whatever makes her dance. The headphones are my favorite. She was just in her own world, with her own beat.
This Instagram comment on my #ootd post made me laugh. I'm so happy that my Husband still thinks I'm a hot piece of ass, because I haven't felt that way at all. My jeans are tighter than they used to be. There are shirts that don't quite fit. It's difficult to remember that I'm not sick anymore. That I've found the correct way to nourish my body without it falling apart. The Hubbs still grabs my ass or my boobs whenever the mood strikes him. He doesn't understand why I complain about the jiggle and the wobbles. I laugh because sometimes he acts like I still look like that twenty two year old who thought she was fat. I appreciate him though. Even when I get mad when he grabs my boobs while I flip pancakes on Sunday morning.
I was feeling really uninspired this week, mostly because I was sick. As I was laying on the couch feverish and grumpy, I stumbled across Writer.ly's "six word story" hashtag. Boom. Inspired. So many writers tweet their six words, and they are so fun to read. I love little challenges like this, because they strike creativity from the silliest of places. I would have never thought to write about a lonely ophthalmologist. Now I can't think of anything else!
I've started volunteering at school again. Now that I'm only working part time, I can do those kinds of things. I took this kind of time for granted when Caitlin was in kindergarten. It's only now that I realize how precious it is, and how quickly it passes. I'm back to kindergarten with Mac, and that time is loud and busy. With Caitlin I'm in a very quiet and very serious class of third graders. It's so quiet while they do their morning work, and I feel like I'm making so much noise as I staple homework packets. The thing that has surprised me the most has been the reception. Three third graders asked me this week when I would be back, and they were disappointed when I told them I had to work. It made me grin, but it made me appreciate the time I can give not just to my girls, but to the teachers and the other students too. Sometimes I surprise myself.
Five things, just in time. Good night Friday. Thanks for the inspiration.