Absolute Mommy

I'm crushing on... {Three Things Thursday}

New year. New me. New you. New goals. One major goal this year is to engage this wonderful blogging community better. What better way than to begin a new link up with some blog friends! Together, the three of us came up with Three Things Thursday. Just three things to talk or write about. Five seemed like too many and "one thing" was like we weren't even trying! So any three things that are on your mind. Any three pictures from Instagram. Three complaints about your day/week. Three of your favorite treats. Seriously. Any three things! So write it. Publish it. Yell it from the mountain tops!

Just be sure you come back and link it up here!

For some extra fun follow us on Instagram for some three things posts!

Use the #threethingsthursday, and let's start talking!

The Foley Fam

Coffee-n-Ink

Absolute Mommy

This week we have invited Tausha from Taush.O to join us for Three Things Thursday. Everyone say hello to Tausha and stop by her blog to see her totally adorable toddler and some amazing DIYs. Thanks for joining us Tausha! Find her on Instagram!

Three things I'm totally crushing on this week.

ONE: This guy

This is Absolute Hubbs when I met him and he was merely Crutch. Okay that's a lie, he's never been merely "anything". From the moment we met, he was trouble. This is the guy. This is the one. This is my end. You see us in selfies and you think you know, and you have an idea. But this face. This was the face I could never say "NO" to. This was the face that melted me, that weakened my knees, that sent me tumbling. Head over heels, face first. Into love. Then marriage. And then into motherhood. His birthday is Saturday, and he's going to complain about being old. But I still see this guy. Every day. Because it's always been this guy. This face.

TWO: Twitter for Writers

Six. Word. Stories. I love them. They make my mind work. They send me into another world with just six words. On days when I can't even make it to a keyboard. When picking up a pen just seems daunting, I know I can go on Twitter and write a six word story. And one day I may go back and write six or seven more words, until there is a real story there. If you are a writer check it out. It's really fun and a great way to write without realizing it.

THREE: Star Wars

My girls loving Star Wars. Like LOVING IT. They were kind of into Chewy in A New Hope, but they lost all sense of themselves when they say Yoda in Empire. Then they just about fell over during Jedi. I mean who can resist the power of Ewoks? Not them. Not me. Not us. Because even the Hubbs became a little geeked out as we made our way through Star Wars episodes 4 through 6 in order to see The Force Awakens. And the answer is Yes. The Force Awakens is just as amazing as everyone is saying. All the talk, all the hype, all the emoji hands that have been spent talking about it, is well deserving. The only question I have for myself is what the heck took me so long? Why did I wait all this time before watching it with my kids? They loved it so much that we made a quick trip to Build A Bear for Ewoks and Princess Leia outfits. Because duh!

This week I had some crushes. Next week who knows. That is the beauty of Three Things Thursday. So let's talk. What three things are you crushing on this week? Don't forget to link up and share your #threethingsthursday.

An InLinkz Link-up

Sometimes I'm a fraud on Instagram

I read a quote the other day that said something like "Instagram is just some one's highlight reel". Wow. That gave me pause. Is my Instagram my highlight reel? Some days yes. Some days no. I have been known to complain or bitch on Instagram about what are most likely first world problems. I have been known to post selfies without make up or dirty hair on Instagram. I've bragged or been shameless about boasting about my kids, my new bag, my Starbucks red cup on Instagram. Does that make Instagram my highlight reel?

My first inclination is to say no. No. Like a hard NO.

Because I made a promise to myself years ago when I started this blog that I was going to be real. In life and on social media. I couldn't be part of that "perfect mothers" club. I couldn't fight that war anymore. I decided all those years ago that I would put myself out there, even when it hurt, even when it was embarrassing. Sometimes I share too much, but, and here is the issue at hand, sometimes I share too little. Sometimes I hide. Sometimes I don't want to be that one person on Instagram that has nothing nice to say. That doesn't happen often, but it still happens. Does that make Instagram my highlight reel?

Yes. Because sometimes I'm a fraud. Most days I feel like a fraud.

I'm never going to be the perfect mother. Never. I've let that one go. It's okay. I'm okay with that now. Do I want to be a good mother? Yes. Good feels real. Good feels attainable. Good feels right. Does that mean that I still yell in the morning? Yes. I'm a good mother if you overlook the fact that sometimes I get real grouchy about making lunches. The same sandwiches with the crusts cut off after I swore to the Almighty that I would never ever cut off the damn crusts. I'm a good mother if you overlook the fact that my kids wear leggings that have stained knees and that sometimes their shirts have little holes in the stitching. I'm a good mother if you forget that sometimes dinner is McDonald's or Fro-Yo because it's school fundraiser night and dinner and fundraisers can't ever happen on the same night. It's just not possible, in fact I think it's a scientific fact. I'm a good mother if you never ask what time my kids go to bed at night, what kind of vitamins they take, or how much milk we go through in a week. Other than that I'm a good mother.

I'd bet that you are a pretty good mother too. As long as I don't look too closely at your base boards and ignore that one chair in your bedroom covered in laundry that never gets folded. And let's be honest with each other, if you are interested in my base boards, then this will never work.

So sometimes I'm a fraud on Instagram. Those selfies when my hair is done and I'm rocking sunglasses mean that I skipped the make up. If you ever see me with make up, my hair probably looks tore up. If you see me ready for work, outfit of the day rocking, kids dropped off, and taking selfies,: chances are my house is a disaster, my legs haven't been shaved in weeks, and both kids cried this morning when I lost my shit about toaster waffles. Because I'm smiling and taking that selfie through the self doubt, the guilt, and the terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach that I'll never be as good as I want to be. And that the kids will notice. That you will notice. That everyone will notice.

Thank God you can't see that in a selfie. Thank God that Instagram hides the anxiety your daughter has about school performances. That it hides the fact that your five year old will only eat chicken nuggets, bagels with cream cheese, or hamburger buns with Kraft singles in rotation on the daily. Thank you God, that Instagram hides that fight you had with your husband last night about the damn trash being stacked higher than you, that he put your cup away on the highest shelf, that I was snippy about making lunches that I said I would make though he offered. Thank God for that.

So yeah. Sometimes Instagram is my highlight reel. Sometimes I need a damn highlight reel to get through the day. I need to focus on those little faces covered in chocolate, ruining their dinner with Target Icees. Some days I need to take a selfie with no make up, dirty hair, and a great pair of sunnies to remember that I'm a good mother. I'm a damn good mother, regardless of the yelling. Regardless of the piles of unfolded laundry. Regardless of the pit in my stomach that tells me otherwise.

Some days you have to own it. All of it. Even the fake and fraudulent. Even the highlight reel.

Especially the highlight reel.

Always own the highlight reel.

GD it's GFree {Chicken Pot Pies}

I will admit that living a gluten free lifestyle is so much easier today than it was in 2003. In 2003 I discovered that I was allergic to gluten and completely cut it out of my diet. Back then in what I call the "dark days" (total Hunger Games reference, because let's face it I was so very hungry!), if you wanted any kind of gluten free baked good, you had to mix your own flours bake it yourself. That involved things like xantham gum and guar gum. Which I still don't understand what they really are. If you were lucky enough to find a mix of any kind your end result was usually inedible. I can't tell you how many dollars were wasted on mixes that yielded baked rocks that tasted so awful that they were immediately spit into the trash. Today those are nightmares of the past. Today we are lucky that there are hundreds of mixes available on the market to meet all our gluten free cravings, and some of our favorite standbys like Bisquick or Betty Crocker have joined in to help make gluten free baking easier on all of us.

Side note: the mixes from Betty Crocker and Bisquick are not organic or GMO free or any of those kind of buzzy jazz words that are used today. In my house we can barely follow gluten free guidelines when we bake. If we happen upon organic or GMO free mixes, lovely. If not, we are going to eat it anyway.

A few weeks back, Caitlin asked for gluten free chicken pot pies. This request sent me in a mini panic because of all the things I do bake, pie crust is not one of them. Pie crust is scary. Pie crust and gluten free baking rarely mix, unless you are a pastry chef or are really good at recipes. I'm not so good at recipes, especially when they have like seventeen steps. I went directly to my resource when I have questions about life... Pinterest. Of course she delivered about a million recipes, many of them calling for scratch crust or biscuits. Thankfully Pinterest now has an easy button and that yielded two recipes. One using regular can biscuits (because sometimes Pinterest is confused and forgets about your gluten free request), and one using Gluten Free Bisquick. I looked at both and came up with my own solution.

For this recipe I used Gluten Free Bisquick and Gluten Free Cafe Cream of Mushroom soup. I was able to find both at Walmart for a very reasonable price. You can also buy these items on Amazon. I also used a muffin pan for those giant over sized muffins. My pan yields six muffins, or six pot pies if you will. If you'd like, you can make this is a 9x13 Pyrex as the original recipe suggest. For me and my family, the muffin pan was the best choice. It was easy to portion control and easy to store in the refrigerator covered in foil.

Gluten Free Chicken Pot Pies

1.5 cups of cooked chicken
2 cups mixed vegetables (whatever your family likes)
1 can Gluten Free Cafe Cream of Mushroom soup
1/4 cup milk

For the Topping
3/4 cup Gluten Free Bisquick
1/2 cup milk
1 egg
2 Tbl melted butter

In one bowl combine first four ingredients and mix well (here you can add any spices if you'd like. I'm not a chef, so I don't spice it up, because that means I will probably eff it up). In a second bowl combine all your topping ingredients and mix until combined. The batter will seem too sticky, it's not, I promise. If you are using a Pyrex pour the chicken and veg mix into the bottom, otherwise spoon it evenly in your muffin pan. Then using an ice cream scoop or whatever you have, I have a cookie scoop, scoop your toppings over the chicken and veg mix. For my muffin pan I did about 1.5 scoops per muffin well. Then use a spoon or your fingers to evenly spread the dough over the top. Bake at 350 for 25-30 minutes.

That's it, it really is that easy. I promise they are good. Like picky eight year old daughter good. Also the non GFree-ers in the family (The Hubbs, My mom) said they were delicious and asked for seconds. Second side note: My mom had these two days after as leftovers and said they were delicious! Awesome right?

Years ago, when I was a real blogger that did things like crafts and cooking, I had a series called "GD it's GFree", hence the title of today's post. In an effort to get back into blogging, I'm bringing it back. The GD could stand for "Gosh Darn", but if you know me at all... Anyway, I'm hoping to share more of the gluten free shortcuts I've learned since Caitlin went gluten free over a year ago. Stay tuned.

A 2016 goal of mine is to link up more.

Because that will make me blog more.

So this post is going to party over at The Foley Fam

and Kristine's Sunday Funday Link Party.

Stop By!

Three things Thursday {3 things I gave up in 2015}

Just be sure you come back and link it up here!

For some extra fun follow us on Instagram for some three things posts!

Use the #threethingsthursday, and let's start talking!

The Foley Fam

Coffee-n-Ink

Absolute Mommy

I ended 2015 thinking about how much I enjoyed Christmas this year. Last year I was in over my head, with a full time job and full time obligations. Stretched so thin that I literally spent an evening crying under my Christmas tree because I wanted six more weeks of Christmas instead of the six days I had left. This year, while working part time, I was able to be present more. I was able to say yes and not resent the obligations I had agreed to. I was able to take my time and not feel so rushed. Still the holidays were just as stressful as usual, and there were mornings where I was just at the end of my line with the simple things. Like what to eat for breakfast. Or why none of the thermoses had been washed the night before. As my family and I made the slow shift from Christmas into the New Year, I began to reflect on all of the things I had let go of this year. The little things that I gave up, those times I finally waved my white flag and surrendered. Because sometimes those little things that we hold so tightly are really the things that stress us the most. That said, here are three small things I let go of in 2015, and honestly I'm so much happier that I did.

1. Fashion Police

I gave up on trying to make my girls wear clothes that matched. This photo doesn't do any justice to the things that I've seen in this past year, but trust me. Some days it's leopard print and stripes. Some days it's plaids and stripes. Some days it's the colors that clash that make me break into a cold sweat of anxiety, but I've learned to hold my tongue. I've learned to let them wear it and test their own fashion boundaries. Especially when I noticed that my objections were changing the way they were feeling out themselves and their personal sense of style. Let's be honest, no one is hurt by patterns that don't match, and I'm not Anna Wintour. What do I know about pattern mixing? Nothing. Those little faces with the crushed looks damn near crushed me when I questioned their "outfits". I I've held my tongue. Bit it so hard on some mornings it almost bled. Making mornings easier now that I look the other way. These days my only job in the fashion department is to make sure they have a coat and shoes.

2. That Bedtime Routine

I know exactly what you are thinking. My kids are eight and five and we don't have a proper bedtime routine. What would Dr. Ferber say? What the hell is wrong with me? Nothing. I'm human. I'm tired. And sometimes everyone piling into Mom and Dad's bed is easier than fighting and crying about all the other things that are wrong with life on a Wednesday night. So, yeah. Sometimes we co-sleep. Still. Even when we don't start out co-sleeping one of the little humans in this house finds their way into our bed. It's fine. We don't have a bed time or a routine and we are still alive. Sometimes we are tired, but we are still alive.

3. Hating my Body

My body isn't the same body I had three years ago. That's been really hard for me. I've spent the majority of my life fighting with the scale, and when I had to give up all grains because of a food allergy I lost a ton of weight. That weight stayed off for more than a year, and then right around thirty five my body started to change again. I'm sure age has something to do with it, but I was also at a point where my body was healthy again. I still don't eat any grains, dairy, sugar, or caffeine. Okay, I'll admit to the occasional Starbucks iced tea, but really it's like my only cheat. The last two years have been hard because my clothes fit differently, my body looks differently, and I feel differently about all of those things. This year, in September an image of me four years ago popped up in my time hop. It was right before I got my diagnosis that sent me to a grain free diet. When I look at the picture I can see that I look sick. My coloring, my hair, my arms. I posted it on Instagram compared to a recent picture of me. I'm thicker in the middle, my arms are bigger, and so are my hips, but my coloring is so much better. Not only that, I feel so much better and I'm happier in so many ways. These pictures were the first steps in accepting this new body. It was freeing to let this body shame go. I finally started to dress with more confidence, and soon I liked what I saw in the mirror again. It's been one of the best things I did in 2015.

I've written about resolutions and words to guide me through 2016, but these three things that I let go of last year have topped my best of 2015 list. Sometimes it's okay to quit the things that don't bring you joy. To give up the things that bring you hardships. Life is hard enough as it is, why keep doing those same things that bring you down? I'm looking forward to letting go of more of those little things in 2016. Cheers to being a quitter of things that are okay to quit... Or something like that!

Grab this button and link up!

An InLinkz Link-up

Resolutions and stuff

I did something to start this year that I rarely do... I went back and read my "resolutions" blog post that kicked off 2015. I was kind of scared. Do any of us really stick to our resolutions? Do any of us keep working out or eating well past January 31st? I broke into a small sweat as I began to read my "resolutions", worried that I hadn't accomplished anything I'd hoped in 2015.

Guess what? Maybe I hadn't stuck to all of my "guns", but I did, for the most part live out that major resolution, that "one little word" I was hoping would guide me last year. You can read about finding my heart of flesh here, but today I'm going to talk about living out my word for 2015. Last year I picked "resolve". I wanted to have resolve in 2015, like a quote I had found that basically stated, "Resolve to let got of everything that isn't making your life better". Can I get an Amen to that? I ended my post last year with this,

"So that next year I'll look back and know, I did everything I could to make it count, with resolve"

I did that you guys. To the best of my knowledge I lived every bit of my life with resolve. I left that job, that no matter what I did, wasn't making me happy. Then I left another job that I knew was a mistake. I cut out a lot of fat and fluff so that I could make working part time work for us. I chose joy and hope and happiness more than I chose to wallow. I swear my 2014 word should have been "wallow", because as sad as it sounds, that mostly what I did. I knew that I had to make some serious attitude adjustments in 2015, and I'm so thankful that I did.

When I sat down to think about what I really wanted out of 2016, I kept going back to the same goal. I wanted to write. It seems every year, since I started this blog, my year resolution has included writing. This year especially it seems like writing is what my heart is demanding. While I was living 2015 with resolve, I was also living 2015 away from the keyboard. It's funny but I have little regret about that. There were days that I could have sat in front of my laptop or PC and hammered out some words, but they would have been forced. You would have noticed. There were days where I wrote my heart out, but never hit publish. It was just stuff, just words and nothing more. The truth is that most days, I was just living, with little to no thought about what was happening or not happening on this blog. So days passed, nothing was posted, and at some point I became okay with that. I posted 82 lonely posts in 2015, less than I did in 2011 (100) when I first started this blog, and way less than 2013 (234) when I felt my blog was at it's peak.

So this year my one resolution and my "one little word" is going to be WRITE. Just write. Write it all out. Type it, color it, use a marker or a crayon. I just want to be stringing words along, enough to wrap them around myself like the most comfortable blanket. I want to type, to make music with the pitter patter of the keys. I want to scribble in margins, use highlighters to make corrections, I want fingers stained with ink. I want to write and hit publish. I want to write and never publish. I just want to write. Everyday if possible, even if it's just a lonely sentence about what I ate today.

via Pinterest

I saw this quote the other day that said we don't need resolutions. It said that resolutions imply that there is continuously something wrong with who we are. As if to imply that something is wrong with how we live day to day. I can see that. Why do we feel the compulsion to change ourselves every January? On the flip side, to resolve to do better, to live better, to love better, can never be a bad thing. How can any resolution to make yourself feel better be a bad thing? Maybe resolutions are crap, and maybe picking a word every year is a dumb thing bloggers do to motivate their readers, but I'm doing it anyway. I'm picking a word, and I resolve to do more of that word. Even when I'm tired. Even when I'm busy. Even on February 1st, 2016, when all my friends have forgotten about the gym, the Whole 30 recipes, and the no screen time rules. I'm going to keep writing, even if I never hit that orange publish button that haunts me.

Because even bad writing is still writing.