Absolute Mommy

The Hangover {Mother's Day} InstaFriday

I know what you are thinking... I still have not posted pictures of Mac's birthday on the 26th of last month. I'm sorry, but this is InstaFriday, and those pictures are ready to go. How does life just get away from us? Like a runaway train? Oh well, I wanted to share all the happenings that we had last weekend. It was a great mother's day, I can't complain!

Friday, I posted this picture to Instagram and Facebook.

It inspired me to write this letter to my mom.

She says I'm about 5 moths old.

I love the smile on her face, it's her,

"hurry and take the damn picture" smile

Since I'm so organized (sarcasm),

a quick trip to Lowes was first on our Friday To Do list.

I stopped at Micky D's so that my kids wouldn't go

bananas in the cart since we left the house without eating.

Is there a more mouthwatering smell than McDonalds?

Ok, so it's the un-healthiest place on earth, but seriously?

Those "hotcakes", smelled divine!

And the kids were all about breakfast on the run.

Look at Caitlin making herself at home in the patio furniture!

This is how I "mom".

Pedis with my absolute favorite people!

I treated my mom, and of course the girles had to crash the party.

Mac even put her feet in the water, and the gal gave her a mini massage!

Mom and I go to the same pedi place all the time.

Our first trip was with my wedding party the Thursday before my wedding!

How awesome is that?

This is a marachino cherry cake.

I found this in Ladies Home Journal!

Yes, I'm such a domestic diva right?

Actually Ladies Home Journal is my newest crush.

I know, it conjures up memories of your grandma,

but this recipe was so easy and

from what my grandma said,

DELISH!

It's also a reprint of a recipe from the 1930s.

I'm not ashamed, anything with marachino cherries is a classic!

This is what we wore on Mother's day.

Details here.

This is my mother's day gift from my girls.

Caitlin picked it out and Daddy paid.

Maxi dress, sandals, and earrings, all from the Loft Outlet.

It's completely styled.

That girls got talent!

On our way from Auntie's in Tulare to Grandma's in Fresno.

Someone just couldn't stand the excitement of mother's day.

I just had to get a pic!

This is my mother's day gift that was made at school.

Caitlin didn't bring it home last week,

so I got it on Tuesday.

I love it!

It says:

I love my mommy because,

she makes me tea in the morning.

That would be sugar sweetened caffinated bliss to you.

This is the second time she has said that "tea"

is what she loves most about mommy.

And while that may make me Mother of the Year,

I could care less!

How was your mother's day weekend?Did you get some great stuff?Did your kids make you something at school?

50 Shades of Twilight {Seriously?}

Warning: This is just my opinion on the book Fifty Shades of Grey.

If you have not read the book, or plan on reading it,

then please note there are some mild spoilers

that are going to be discussed today.

If you don't care one way or the other,

here is my take on the "hottest" book around,

and why I sort of enjoyed it.

**********

I just finished Fifty Shades of Grey. And I really wanted to like it. I had heard all the buzz, I had read lots of reviews. I had even watched Robin Roberts and Lara Spencer blush and get hot and bothered on GMA. My sister in law, who is so conservative she makes Nancy Reagan look like Brittney Spears, liked the book. So, "happy mother's day to me", I downloaded it my kindle. And this was my first reaction:

Meet Ana Steele and Christian Grey:

via Pinterest: Deanna Dyer / http://media-cache5.pinterest.com

Ok, let me back up a little. I knew going in that Fifty Shades was originally Twilight fan fiction. E.L. James wrote "Master of the Universe", featuring Edward and Bella in some compromising positions. I didn't have the privilege to read "universe", so I can't comment on that. However I will say, after reading all four Twilight books, I would have devoured any and all racy material featuring Edward and Bella.

Here is why I can't love Fifty Shades, it is so clearly Twilight erotica that I almost threw my Kindle. The characters in Fifty Shades have changed in name only. Christian is no longer a vamp, but he is still controlling and foreboding. Ana is still a plain Jane, klutzy as all get out, and still reading turn of the century British literature. Oh and let's not forget "Jose" who is so clearly Jacob Black that I gagged!

Ana's mother is still unstable and child like, Christian's brother is Emmet Cullen, and his sister, just fresh from Paris, is Alice. So much so, that I was waiting for her to have a vision where Victoria or the Volturi are on their way.

Now on to the smut here for a minute. We all know that the real pull to this book are the sex scenes. I will tell you right now I am no prude. I am not embarrassed about sex or sexual preferences. So the sex in this book was, as expected, hot and steamy. It was erotic on a whole different level, especially if you like to be shackled, tied, spanked, or submitted into orgasm. I'm all for getting tied up as much as the next gal, but seriously, when does Ana get to tie up Christan?

What got me the most about Fifty Shades was that I could only enjoy the book, because I read it as another book in the Twilight Saga. Fifty Shades is an author's interpretation of what would happen if Edward put aside his traditional views, and decided to bed Bella, on his terms, ie. restraining her so she can't make him lose control. I find it very telling that every time Ana blushes and flushes, that Christian loses all control, and becomes lustful for sex. Much like Edward would become lustful for Bella's blood at the quickening of her heart or at the blush of her skin. I kept yelling at my Kindle, "Just bite her already and turn her into a vampire!!!" It's also my opinion that this is exactly what would have happened in Eclipse, right after Bella graduated from Forks High, and Victoria didn't build her army and come looking for Bella. I wonder how Stephanie Meyer feels about that.

It may also just be the 34 year old housewife and mother of two in me, but was anyone else exhausted by the sex scenes? Sure they were enjoyable, and gave new meaning to "food for thought", but seriously? I was exhausted! I surely would not be able to wake up the next morning and do "it" all over again. Just reading Fifty Shades made me long for my bed, and 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Maybe I'm showing my age, perhaps if I was 22 like Bella, I mean Ana, I'd be totally hot for Christian too, but I'd rather have a snack and a nap at this point.

Fifty Shades had been deemed "mommy porn" and rightfully so, as it's very sexed up and no plot. I kept waiting for a pizza delivery boy or a pool boy to show up. I even wondered if Taylor, was going to film it all just to make it more like late night "skin-o-max". If I'm being honest, I will say that I kept wondering if Christian would do something truly erotic to all the haggard moms like me. Like say, take out the over flowing trash, or do the dishes that are stacked in the sink.

Maybe someone needs to write new "mommy porn" with believable turn-ons like, kids that don't night wake, dad's who take the overnight feedings, and come home from work with take out. Is it too much to ask, to have a scene where the most erotic action is being served breakfast in bed by a personal chef, and being told a housekeeper is on their way over, and that you are going to a spa day, where they show all your favorite shows on DVR?

No? Just me?

West Coast Blog Hop

I'm so excited to be co-hosting a wonderful link party,
aimed at bringing us together on the West Coast!
This is about making new friends close to home,
and possibly creating stronger bonds in real life.
I'm so excited and hope that all my west coast readers link up!
Take it away, Katlyn!

It's that time again! We're hanging out with our fellow West Coasters! Link up with us!

Are you a blogger on the West Coast?

Are you seeking to find new friends in the blog-o-sphere and possibly in real life?

Well you have come to the right place!

Your Host:

Katlyn @ The Dreamy Meadow

Your Co-Hosts:

Jessica @ Before The I Do's

Laura @ Our Reflection

Megan @ Absolute Mommy

Melissa @ The Life of a Not So Ordinary Wife

What are the rules?

1. Follow your hosts.

If you are interested in co-hosting email me at katlyn[dot]larson[at]gmail[dot]com

2. Link up your home page in the state that you reside in.

3. You see those little Twitter and Facebook buttons? Hit them and share!

4. Grab the button and put it somewhere on your lovely blog!

5. Mingle your heart away & have fun!

Washington:

Oregon:

California:

Alaska:

Hawaii:

WWW: Mothers Day {Mom moment}

What We Wore: Mother's Day

It was fantastically hot on Mother's Day, which is super scary,

because today is May 16th.

A Fresno summer rarely ends before October 31st.

So I totally dressed for a comfy and relaxed Mother's Day.

Me:

sorry this isn't the best picture, Caitlin took it.

Neon Stripes: Target

Layering Tank: Old Navy

Jean shorts: Kohl's

Miss Mac:

Ballerina Shirt with capris, and tutu skirt: JC Penny's

Hello Kitty Ballet Flats: Target (are you dying?)

Bottle: Because I'm not ready to take it away.

Caitlin:

Fancy Tank Dress: Gymboree Outlet (Tulare CA)

Necklace: Gymboree Outlet

Wrap Around Floral ankle Flats: Target

Smile: Cinnamon rolls

Now, for my Mommy Moment of the day:

Exhibit A:

That my friends is Caitlin's cap and gown.

For preschool graduation in 2 weeks.

I'm dying.

I'm so not ready for this.

I know, I know, I've had since August to wrap my head around it.

However, it feels like I was preggo with her yesterday,

roasting in the Fresno sun.

My baby is a big girl.

With a cap and gown.

I think I need a drink.

What's your Mommy Moment of the day?

Be sure to check out Our Reflection's linky party: Button

Link up your house here.

And please stop by and say hello to:

A featured sponsor this month!

Yes we are!

I'm going to start by saying that I HAVE NOT read the Time Magazine article that has been discussed in every media outlet for the past week.

Of course I have seen the cover, and while I'm not excited about it, to each is own.

As I commented to one of my friends,

"I wasn't big on breastfeeding before, so I'm not a good judge of this cover".

That said, feel free to tell me your thoughts on the cover and article if you read it.

"Are you Mom enough?" - Time Magazine

Excuse me?

You are challenging me to explain to you if I'm "Mom" enough?

Well since you asked, I will gladly answer.

I was mom enough the day that stick had 2 pink lines, and I said "Oh Shit!" in my bathroom. I was 27, and more than ready, but in that instant I knew my life would change forever. After I got over the initial shock, yes, I was ready for anything.

I am mom enough as I have suffered through 2 pregnancies with all day sickness. Two pregnancies where I didn't glow, I was green. One pregnancy, where I was too sick to care for my two and a half year old. So yeah, I'm mom enough.

I am mom enough because I cried day in and day out because my boobs would not work. They were a betrayal of my own body. What good are boobs if they can't do their job in their most simplest and natural form?

I am mom enough because I understood that Formula was not an "F" word, and went against the grain and outright refused to try breastfeeding a second time... Because this time I was in control of my destiny, and no Doula, Lactation Specialist, or certainly Time Magazine is going to change my mind.

I am mom enough because I have forgone, sleep, showers, hot meals, my sanity. I have given all I have in my heart, mind, body, and soul. I give my all to both my kids and my husband. To the point that I forget the woman I am, and only wholly identify with being a mom. Ask Time Magazine how that would work for him.

I am mom enough to be outright enraged my the insinuation that because I didn't breastfeed or carry my baby around on my body, that I am not "mom" enough. What would you say to a "mother" who is in the depths of fertility treatments? What would you say to her? That she is not mom enough? That the drugs and procedures she has put her body through, make her less of a mother because she can only mother that child in her dreams?

Would you challenge a mother with a baby in Heaven? Would you challenge a mom who only got her child for a few precious moments that she is "mom" enough? That mother, with her child in heaven can say she is "mom" enough, because she is... More mom than I will ever be or ever know.

Would you challenge a military mom that she is mom enough? Her life spent serving her country, only to come back and be challenge at her ability to "mom". Are you joking me? Would you rather her take her child with her strapped on her back, through the desert, just so she can live up to your expectation?

Would you dare challenge a man, that he is Father enough?

So yes, WE ARE MOM ENOUGH.

The working moms, splitting their sanity between work and motherhood, forgetting themselves in the fray, they are mom enough.

The SAHMs, who are told they "don't work", where happy children, food on the table, and sometimes clean floors, will never live up to expectation because it doesn't pay the bills, they are mom enough.

The moms with special needs children, who can't breastfeed, co-sleep, or carry their child on their bodies, yes they are mom enough.

The moms with babies in heaven, who live their days thinking only of that child, wanting to co-sleep, and hold, that child, to breastfeed that child, yes they are mom enough.

The moms who sacrifice all they have. All they are worth. All they they would ever dream to be, for just one moment of motherhood, yes they are mom enough.

So please, don't challenge me again. Don't ask a question you cannot answer yourself. Because if you have to ask if I'm mom enough, it's obvious you have no idea!