Sometimes subliminal messages work. I received one the other day that reminded me that I'm not always the most positive person. You all know I have never been Miss Positive Polly, and I know that about myself. I however don't want the world to think that I absolutely hate motherhood. I don't hate motherhood, it's just sometimes not the job I'm best suited to do. I actually love being a mother, love the name mommy (the first 100 times it's used, anyway), and have NO REGRETS. Well, if I have regrets they are mommy regrets and guilt that have more to do with me than with my kiddos.
I try to find humor in the situations I get myself into.
I feel like if I can laugh about it then I can survive it.
I have always been and will always be sarcastic.
I apologize if that makes me a little crass, a little hard to swallow, a little bitchy.
Well no, I don't apologize, but most of you just embrace it, and I appreciate that.
What I'm getting at is that I am 110% GRATEFUL for what I have.
I am beyond blessed.
Even this week with a sick kiddo that took a trip to Children's Hospital
(constipation to the Nth degree, yeah I know, more poop!).
I have the privilege of being home with both girls.
Being able to be their #1 caregiver since day one.
Something that I take for granted daily.
I have a great and completely hilarious HUSBAND that makes all this happen,
and I take him for granted daily too.
I also take for granted that he still loves me best, no matter the situation or the situations that I create.
I take for granted that I have little people who call me mom.
Twice blessed in fact.
I know that some women unfortunately don't get this gift.
The fact isn't lost on me and I am humbled every time I think about it.
I was lucky that my little bundles of joy, were in fact bundles of joy,
that I held immediately after labor.
That I got to take home.
That I GET to watch grow up.
And I admit that I do forget that it's a privilege and an unbelievable blessing.
If you know me and know me well, then you know I will never change who I am to please someone. I won't change my writing or my honesty. If you've been following this blog then you will know, it's been balls out since day one. As my friend Krysten says, that is just my brand of Motherhood. It's how I roll. I think that most of you appreciate it.
At the end of the day, it's my children who make me the person I am today. It's because of my journey with them that I have something to write about. It's their love that makes the trials and tribulations of motherhood worth every damn jar of poop the lab requires. As always I will continue to write from my heart and shoot from my hip. That's what Absolute Mommy is all about, and I pretty positive that you will love me anyway.
