The quest to be mom


I spend the majority of time in this place writing about my trials in motherhood.  I complain about whinny crying babies.  I complain about sleepless nights, early mornings, potty training, and poop.  I complain about not enough me time, not enough us time, not enough time period.  I spend lots of time complaining about being a mom.  

It never occurred to me that I'm blessed to have a complaint.

Before I became a mother, I didn't know that for some women, motherhood is a quest.  I was of the school of thought that you got pregnant, you had a baby, you became mom, end of story.  I didn't know anything about loss and infertility.  It took 9 months to conceive Caitlin, and I was getting worried.  I was told by my doctor that I had old eggs (at 28 no less).  I was told by my mother in law that time was wasting.  I was told by my mother that she wasn't getting any younger.  I was told a lot of things, but none of those were that conceiving was impossible.  Because that just didn't occur to me.

But today it does.  Today I know someone who is in the throws of infertility.  She is quite possibly on the last leg of her journey.  She's had heartbreak and disappointment.  She's had a struggle with her faith.  She's had to come to grips with the "impossible".  She's had to endure things that I know nothing about.

I have no words that will comfort her.  That is so hard for me.  What can I say?  I know that she reads my blog, and I wonder, does she want to choke me?  Tell me how lucky I am that I have mouths to feed, or butts to wipe?  Does she have to turn away some days because I'm so "overwhelmed" with being a mother?  What can I say to comfort her?  I know nothing of her struggle.  Quite frankly I can't even imagine.

Today I want to say to her that mothers are made from many cloths.  Sometimes they are made in unconventional ways.  There is no single journey to motherhood.  The roads are different for every one.  Some of us take one fork, some of us take another.  No matter the way, we all end up at the same place.  Motherhood.

Today I want to offer her an extra prayer.  I want to offer her my hand to hold.  I want to offer her words of inspiration.  I want her to know that in her quest for motherhood she is not alone.  She is not the last.  She is not at the finish line.  Because mothers never give up.  They will never take no for an answer.  They always trudge on, through the trenches.  There is no finish line, when you are a mom.

I want her to know, that in her quest to be a mom, she already is one.



Amanda has been writing in honor of NIAW, 
be sure to check out her posts.

Also linking up here.

5 comments:

  1. I got pregnant easily, and sometimes I feel bad because I know plenty of people who struggle, who have been struggling for years, who wish they could just blink and get pregnant.

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  2. Oh lands alive! I got pregnant just thinking about it! I have a friend who has been trying for 3 years now. I hated telling her I was prego, I felt so guilty! This posts helps me to remember to stand with her in hope and friendship rather than let guilt do its dirty work. Thank you! Heather M, www.RockStew.com

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  3. Oh lands alive! I got pregnant just thinking about it! I have a friend who has been trying for 3 years now. I hated telling her I was prego, I felt so guilty! This posts helps me to remember to stand with her in hope and friendship rather than let guilt do its dirty work. Thank you! Heather M, www.RockStew.com

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  4. Thank you so much for this post, Megan. I absolutely love it. It's beautifully written, and so heart-felt.

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