If you can't already tell, I've been suffering from writer's block this week. Not anything major, just overwhelmed by life and the mess of it. I've been on the go, I've been crafting, and let's be honest here I've been playing candy crush and stalking some of you on Instagram. Here is another repost that originally appeared on Confessions of a Semi-Domesticated Mama over a year ago.
And who knows I may have posted it here.
So I hope you enjoy some of my old stuff,
even if you have been reading for awhile.
Dear Megan, age 17
You are going to think this is crazy, but I'm you. Seventeen, or so years from now.
I know, I know, you don't want to hear it, because you are smarter than me. Let's be honest, you think you are smarter than everyone.
|Such attitude, 17 is serious business.|
Well honey, you're not.
You think you suck right now. You think that your differences set you apart. That you are strange and ugly. You think that because the boys aren't knocking down your door, that that means you suck.
On the contrary that's what makes you incredible.
I know you put up a nice front. That you are strong and tough, that nothing can hurt you or touch you. Nice try, I know what's going on. And trust me. I'll never forget what you are feeling right now.
Here's what I want to tell you.
Mr. Right now, is actually Mr. Wrong. Be grateful. What you think is love, is literally high school. Sure he is what you think you want, but he doesn't want you and that's the toughest lesson to learn. Learn it, embrace it, and be better for it. I'll let you know right now, that you eventually do this, and you are just fine...
The next few Mr. Rights are Mr. Wrongs too. Sorry, just a warning.
You are not going to make it to Berkley. You are not going to major in Poly Sci with a minor in Women's Studies. You will not go on to design a skate punk line for girls... I know, I know, majorly crushing your dreams.
YOU WILL, go to college, and even join a sorority... Hear me out, now. It's an amazing group of women, who will help you find your true self. Who will love you even though you are dressed like a skater the first night they meet you. Who will walk next to you through every major milestone in your life.
YOU WILL, find Mr. Right, and he will be Mr. Right, but that road will not be easy and you will work very hard on that relationship. But you are passionate and only your best self with him. Don't even think about looking for him now. He will come to you when you least expect it, and you will be wearing little make-up and a hat, but he will call you anyway.
YOU WILL marry a registered republican, who will someday drive a gas guzzling SUV, and makes fun of you because you will one day ask him if you need to compost. He will not like the Beatles, he will have no idea who the Descendents are, and will only like Blink 182s new stuff. Deal with this. HE IS IN FACT THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.
|This is you and the hubbs on your|
7th Wedding Anniversary.
YOU WILL HAVE BABIES and they are beautiful and give you a renewed life. I know you hate kids now, but somewhere about 25 you will change your mind about procreating. Everything you thought you knew about love and devotion will go out the window with motherhood. I'm just warning you now. This will change you, the amazing part is, you won't care.
|This is you and your babies at the beach (2011).|
They are your heart and soul.
MOTHERHOOD WILL BE THE HARDEST JOB YOU HAVE. You will think you suck at it. Well this might actually be a good thing to mention now. How you feel right now at 17 about yourself, you will feel all over again at 29 with a newborn. This too will pass, and you will find your way. Take my advice. Ask for help. Lean on people. Let it go. Be the mother you want to be, not the mothers you read about in the books. Those books suck and don't tell you the nitty gritty on what to expect. Expect exhaustion, expect a landslide of emotion, expect joy and liberation. Expect to love and hate it at the same time. And expect to want to do it all over again, ten fold.
So now I will close by telling you to LIVE THIS LIFE. Even when you think it sucks. Don't give up on you. Be grateful you are living it. Dreams change, people change, goals change. So let go, and be. Let go and do. Let go and thrive. Don't be scared, be excited. This life is all we never dreamed of.
Megan, aged 35 and counting