Yes, you read that right. Mommy and her mad face. This unfortunately isn't a title I came up with all on my own. This is a title bestowed upon me and my face by my three year old. Sometimes it's "Mommy has her made face", "Mommy why do you have your mom face?", or my favorite, "Mommy are you going to get your mad face?". Should we talk about the mommy guilt overload at this point? Let's not and skip to the part about my mad face.
As you can tell, I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, but on my face. If I can be vain for a moment, I really like my smile. Even with some imperfect teeth, I think my smile is one of my best features. It really does change my face. It also makes me look nice and approachable. You probably think I'm the nicest blogger around if you follow me and all my shameless selfies on Instagram. If you know me in real life then you know, I can be Bitchzilla in 30 seconds flat. When I'm not smiling, the assumption is that my day sucks, I'm mad, or all of the above. I wear every annoyance, every hiccup in the day, every time one of my kids is whining about who's turn it is on the iPad, on my face. I'd like to think that I have a variety of expressions that cross my face.
Truth is I have two, Smiling Mommy or Mad Face Mommy.
Mad face has been my look of choice these days. Because my kids for the life of me don't want to take a bath. Even when they are stinky with black bottomed feet, hair almost to the point of dreadlocks, and sticky necks. My mad face shows up when one kids wants to swim at Grandma's and the other wants to play in her bedroom (not at grandma's). Mad face is a staple at Target, where we are still debating on how many Monster High dolls it takes to complete a collection. I mean how many Lagoona Blue's do you need kid? Mad face is always invited to dinner because who wants to eat carrots and broccoli? Mad face has been my staple for months, just like jean cut offs, white t-shirts, and flip flops.
Perhaps I should be apologetic. I have to admit the first time I heard "mommy's mad face" out of my three year old's mouth, it broke my heart. I don't want to have a "mad face". I don't want my reaction to be "total bitch face" when my kids have a melt down, but it is what it is. It's really effing hard to smile when your kids is half crying half whining in Target over Squinkies. It's doubly hard to smile when your three year old just peed all over the bathroom floor because she waited too long to go, and she has been potty trained for almost a year. It's super hard to grin and bare it when both your kids decide that tonight's dinner sucks, and they want PB & J and you are of course out of bread.
At this point I'm really tired of "Mommy's mad face". I don't like hearing it, or wearing it. I really want it to be on the fall "don't" list. My goal is to try really hard to smile when I have those "mommy dearest" moments. Sure, motherhood isn't flowers and unicorns, but it is pretty cool. For all the times I have a "mommy mad face", I can also have a blissful smile too. I guess that's because there is always a silver lining. For every potty accident there are kisses and hugs. For every disastrous dinner, there are desserts to make everyone happy. For every Target trip that ends in tears, there is always one that ends in triumph.
It's also entirely possible that I don't have a mad mommy face,